Have you ever had that little nagging thought that something is off or you're doing something wrong or you need to change something? Well, I have. Sometimes it's just me, but usually it's the prodding of the Holy Spirit.
The past little while - several weeks, if I were honest with myself - I have been horribly inconsistent in spending time with God. It's not that I didn't REALIZE this. I knew it... it's just easy to brush it off and find excuses. Tonight, in an awesome discussion at life group, it hit me that I have become so comfortable in DOING ministry, that I've neglected time BEING with my Creator. I've become lazy and lost the passion to just BE with Jesus... and it's so easy to justify doing so because I am so passionate about ministry and I serve at my church all the time and I have godly friendships. But, in the end, what does that all mean if I really don't KNOW Jesus? I'm not taking about blocking out an hour each day to read from a Christian book, write in my journal, read the Proverb of the day, and say a stoic, monotonous prayer. I'm talking about being in constant communion with my Lord and Savior. I'm talking about digging deep in my heart to get out the junk and work through it, rather than shove it all in a corner. I'm talking about interceding for the nations, for my family and friends, for my relationships, etc. I'm talking about getting excited about opening my Bible - fully expectant that God WILL speak to me!
It's not about asking "Do I love God?" or "Do I want to know God?" Yes, of course I do. The real question is - do my actions line up with that answer? Is my life the picture of a woman seeking the face of God so intently that everyday battles don't even phase her? I want that to be me. But I'd better make sure I'm taking steps to get there!
"Your direction, not your intentions, determine your destination."
No comments:
Post a Comment