Pages

"... the mind controlled by the Spirit is LIFE & PEACE." -- Romans 8:6

Friday, September 30, 2011

Oh, Life. You crack me up.

In relation to my post "Hard Does NOT Equal Bad" (Click HERE to read it!), I just want to add that not only is "hard" not always bad, sometimes it's awesome. Or at least, it has some pretty awesome results. I have undeniably experienced some AWESOME breakthrough this week. Though it was hard, it is so beyond exciting to look back and see all that God has done and know that I am not the same person today that I was last Friday. I have a whole new perspective and understanding of who I am, who God is, and what it means to walk in the Spirit. Yes, all of that happened in one week and I wasn't even at high school summer camp! ;-) Just living life. Seeking God. Making decisions. Being bold.

The interesting thing about this is that sometimes people don't like change. They criticize a decision and suggest alternative routes and bring on the "what if?" questions and "If I were you I would have..." comments. As I'm trying to move AWAY from pleasing people instead of God, my response to those criticisms will be... I'm okay with that. I'm okay that I don't know what I'm doing. I'm okay that I don't have all the answers. I am now less concerned with figuring out "What is the RIGHT thing?" and more concerned with keeping my heart still and my mind silent to be open and receptive to how the Holy Spirit directs me - even when I can't explain WHY.

This new mindset sure makes living for God EXCITING! It feels like a real journey. Not just following a rule book. It's all about a relationship.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

The "Sweetness" of Trusting

’Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,

Just to take Him at His Word;
Just to rest upon His promise,
And to know, “Thus saith the Lord!”

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him!
How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er;
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
Oh, for grace to trust Him more!

Oh, how sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to trust His cleansing blood;
And in simple faith to plunge me
’Neath the healing, cleansing flood!

Yes, ’tis sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just from sin and self to cease;
Just from Jesus simply taking
Life and rest, and joy and peace.


I’m so glad I learned to trust Thee,
Precious Jesus, Savior, Friend;
And I know that Thou art with me,
Wilt be with me to the end.
---------------------------------------

The burden is not mine, but His. Full surrender. The sweetness of trusting in Jesus is freedom to be who He wants me to be. Eliminating anxiety, worry, fear. Life may not look the way I want or expect it to, but I trust that His way is better. I don't have to even HAVE a plan... I just need to be obedient and trust in His.

So grateful for the seriously intense ways that God has been working on my heart. Things that I thought I knew, but didn't really believe... therefore, was not acting out in. What it really means to trust. What it looks like for me to take Him at His Word and believe that His promises are true. That the joy of the Lord truly is my strength. That I can make decisions and seek Him all along the way... rather than understanding the entire plan before I take my first step. It's all coming together! Oh, I know that I have so much to learn. But I just love to see progress and growth and change. Refinement. Whew, quite the process!

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Ohhhh, Decisions.

So I already spent a lot of time blogging today, I'll keep this brief:

I made a decision! All on my own! MostlyI just gathered information, sought counsel, made my pros/cons list, prayed, thought it all through on my own, and came to a conclusion. The best part is that I really DO feel peace about it! I love the way the Lord speaks to my heart!

I'm going to drop one of my classes. All reasons regarding the class itself aside, my other classes are hurting (so I'll need more time to direct my attention/effort there, too...) and basically, I just don't want to hate life. So something needs to change again. Those two reasons are enough for me.

As soon as I thought to blog this, I was reminded of the only other time I dropped a class - I was living in Texas and going to school at Tyler Junior College and hated making decisions just as much as I do now. Here's my blog post from that experience: Decision Making - March 2010 -- It was SO great to read that post tonight and find encouragement in what the Lord taught me then, since it all applies again now!

He is faithful and will carry me through.
I am capable of making decisions and listening to the voice of the Lord!
Whew. Now, I'm going to sleep... waking up in 5 short hours. :- /

Sooo... WHEN will I ever learn?!

Alright, people.
This is getting a little ridiculous.

God is SO specific and intentional in how He interacts with, teaches, and directs us. I truly believe that and definitely see evidence of it weaved all throughout my life. I absolutely LOVE when I can see how He specifically works in my life or in other people's lives.

My struggle is in that I know I've been enduring a particularly difficult season for the past month or so and the weight of the struggle is definitely wearing me down. The great part is that I can clearly see how I have drawn nearer to the Lord through this time... I have been purposeful in seeking Him and standing on truth and cherishing the blessing of community. The not-so-great part is that I feel like I can SEE what I'm supposed to be learning in the midst of the struggle... but I must not be "getting" it because I just. keep. struggling... and enduring.

I chose to quit a smaller than part-time childcare job because my schedule was too much to handle. I am trying to decide whether or not I need to drop a class - partially because I don't have the time to put into it and partially because I am consistently doing poorly on assignments and our midterm is tomorrow - so I'm nervous. I got my British Literature midterm back today and I failed it. Literally. I am processing foreign emotions and trying to understand my own heart and trying to understand the Lord's Will in all of it. I had a cold for a week... and I rarely get sick. I have to practice patience like crazy when working with a 4 and 7 year old early in the mornings.

I know that sometimes life is just hard. It's only a season. This will NOT last forever.

When I got my Brit Lit test back today and saw the grade I just wanted to laugh and my first thought was, "Seriously, Lord?! I must have more to learn (and I don't mean about literature!)."

The resounding message of my life right now is DEPENDENCE. What does it mean to depend on God fully... to trust in Him with everything I have.... to lean not on my own understand, but acknowledge Him in all my ways? I think that this highly correlates to identity. I rely on HIM to determine who I am, not on anything I conjure up in my own successes or failures. (or what grades I earn, how much money I have, what people say/think about me, etc, etc.) What does it look like to DO this tangibly? Well, clearly, I have no idea. :) But I know that it has to do with being grounded in truth, surrounding yourself with a community of Believers, and taking your thoughts captive. When I get that test back with the horrible grade on it that I studied for hours on I don't allow it to change my identity in any way based on the type of thoughts that I allow myself to think on.

And not giving up. We PRESS ON toward our goal. So that's what I shall do. :)

Monday, September 26, 2011

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”

C.S. Lewis

A Great Weekend AND [surprisingly] a Great Start to the Week!

This weekend was full and fun and refreshing, as usual. I have especially enjoyed weekends since starting school as the weekdays are exhausting! I didn't do ANY homework on Saturday or Sunday - which is not normal, or recommended. I did however, take a two hour nap on Friday AND get more homework done than I planned on doing, so it's all good. :) Saturday I went to my first Bible Study in a series on the fruit of the Spirit - it went SO well! Then I went rock climbing with a group of friends - rather, I watched from the bottom while they climbed. ;-) THEN I went to the first BSU home football game - so fun!! I got to spend a lot of time chatting with my good friend, Molly, too. I love talking with her because she's GREAT at asking questions that make me think. I'm so grateful for her friendship! Sunday was full of church, Extreme Life, grocery shopping, laundry, and a neighborhood "social" with Lindsay and Liz... then I made the wise decision to go to bed early. (I never regret that decision! Especially on a Monday morning.)

I seriously think that this is the first Monday morning that I haven't dreaded the coming week... I must be making it through this season of endurance/perseverance. Praise God! It's been difficult, but oh so fruitful in my life. I totally see how God has used the past month to grow me and stretch me and draw me near to Him. For that, I am truly grateful. I know that this week will be hard (midterm in my most difficult class, a LOT of reading to catch up on, etc), but it doesn't have to be BAD. I know that God is working in me and shaping me into the confident, godly woman that He created me to be - and that gives me JOY!

Friday, September 23, 2011

A Little Rest for the Weary...

This morning I got up at 5:00 and spent time with Jesus, which was wonderful and refreshing as usual.

Then I went to work from 6:30-9:20. Then I came home and slept from 9:30-11:15. I feel SO great. I'm pretty sure I could have just stayed in bed and been content sleeping off and on for the next 5 hours or so. :)

I had planned on getting 4-5 or more hours of homework done today like I did on Monday and Wednesday of this week... but I know that REST is the wise choice for today. I'm going to just stay home tonight to make myself a good dinner, get some homework done, prepare for my Bible Study in the morning, and go to bed early. Sounds like a pretty fabulous Friday night to me!

Rest is necessary. I know that tomorrow will be a long day - I'm going to the first home football game of the season! SO excited! Sunday will be full of church and getting through the homework that I'm intentionally not doing today. But that's okay. I've worked really hard this week... the past several weeks. So it's OKAY that I took a 2 hour nap. Sometimes a little sleep is all you need... I highly suggest it.

Happy Friday!

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Here's the darling 7-year-old girl from the previous post :)

I love this girl!

Simply Ridiculous -

Have you ever had a "bad day" and then a week later looked back and realized it wasn't all that bad?

What about times when you get upset over something and then question if it was really worth the blow up?

Well, this morning I had the pleasure of walking a darling, sometimes emotional, 7-year-old girl through the ridiculousness of our petty emotions. I told her (and her brother, too! She tried to say I wasn't being fair, but Gannon had the same rule.) that she could play on the computer after she got dressed and brushed her teeth. Then she stomped up the stairs and shut her bedroom door, rather harshly, I might add. After she was dressed for school and continued to display a pouty face and a whiny voice, I suggested we sit on the stairs for a little chat. (learning moment? hopefully.) I said, "Channing, tell me what's really wrong? Why are you upset?" She started to reply, "Well, I just want to do what I want to do!" She barely made it through her answer before I saw her mouth twitch and she quickly put her head in her lap. Knowing that whatever frustration she felt seemed to have diminished, I teased her, "Channing - are you laughing? Do you know that there is NO laughing in this house?!" (One of my parents used to joke like that all the time, I don't remember who.) Then she did smile and laugh! I told her: "You know what my mom always tells me? Nobody will want to be around you if you're grumpy." Her eyes got big and she said, "That's what MY mom tells ME!" (It must be a mom thing.) The point is, Chan had spent all morning going back and forth between grumpy/happy, and choosing to act out of her emotions in the moment. She didn't look at the fact that getting dressed takes her about 3 minutes, so it's REALLY not worth getting so upset over.

This made me think about how I typically deal with my own, sometimes flippant, emotions. Usually what happens, is that I realize I'm frustrated (or insecure, or angry, or growing bitter, etc, etc) and then I get frustrated that I'm frustrated. It's like the snowball effect - my emotions just build up until the frustration is WAY bigger than necessary and the thing that originally caused frustration shouldn't even qualify as a frustration-causing event.

NOTE: It is okay to have emotions!!!

2nd NOTE: There IS a healthy way to deal with emotions.

That being said, I will choose to take my thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ. (2 Corinthians 10:4-5) Practically, this means that I am not going to dwell on negative emotions that build up into one big ball of frustration.

Frustration is not a reason to be more frustrated - It's a vicious cycle.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Hard Does NOT Equal Bad

I had this thought last night right after I got in bed... eager to fall asleep and rest, I quickly turned my lamp back on and jotted "hard is not bad" on a pad of sticky notes next to my bed for this very purpose. (I probably should have done this TWO nights ago... instead I just lay awake for an hour with my mind racing!)

There's a difference between saying "I'm going to have a hard day," and "I'm going to have a bad day." OR... "This test will be bad/hard," "Life is hard/bad," "Relationships are hard/bad." Not everything that is HARD is also BAD. The reason why it's important not to confuse the two is because of the connotation of - the feelings associated with - each word. I need to separate them in my mind because if I go into a day/test/life/relationship assuming that it will be BAD, then I already have a negative outlook and will continue in that (which will effect my words/actions) negativity unless I consciously change my habits/thought patterns. At the same time, I need to recognize that it's okay that things are hard. It's okay. Hard means I can't do it on my own. Hard means I need Jesus to guide me through the muck. Hard means there is a need to be vulnerable with a community of believers. Hard means it will be easier to recognize the goodness of God contrasting with... everything else. A hard week means a restful weekend is ahead. ;-)

Hard means challenging, pushing, striving, growing, learning, seeking, and persevering and ALL of these things are a part of the process of making us more and more like Jesus.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

A List.


For today's random post, a random picture: gangsta?

I love lists. Most often, that is how my brain works... in lists. :) Here's one for today: A list of happy & exciting things. Because sometimes it's just good to choose to think about THOSE things.

1. I just picked up my ticket for the first home football game on Saturday! SO EXCITED! I love football games!

2. Skype is one of my favorite things (when it works properly)! I love that I can have a great conversation, face-to-face, with a friend who lives 2000 miles away.

3. I think coffee (or the creamer in coffee) has been making me sick. Ok, that's not a happy or exciting thing... I'm not sure how it made it on this list.

4. I'm starting a Bible Study this Saturday morning on the fruit of the Spirit! SUPER excited about this!

5. Today is Tuesday, which means I have life group, which means I'm about to eat (in 3 hours) the BEST dinner I'll eat all week. Megan truly outdoes herself... we are blessed!

6. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Thank you, Jesus, for HOPE!

7. Channing & Gannon both had AWESOME attitudes this morning before school, which helps me have an awesome attitude!

8. The song "Love is Not a Fight" by Warren Barfield [Listen to it HERE] just came on my pandora radio station. This is seriously one of my favorite, favorite songs. "Love is not a fight, but it's something worth fighting for"

9. It is barely cool enough today (70s/80s) to wear leggings under my skirt, which means it's GOT to be almost fall! I'm looking forward to boots/scarves/sweater weather very much. :) Then after fall it will be winter, which means SKI season!

10. Well... I feel like there should be a number ten because that would make the list look more complete... but I really can't think of anything else "exciting." This will have to do. :)

Monday, September 19, 2011

Simple Revelation.

I LOVE hearing from the Lord. When some piece of truth just CLICKS in my head and I GET it. Just one glimpse of His grace, one reminder of His love, one hint of His steady faithfulness... always leave me so in awe of my Savior.

This morning I wrote in my journal "I don't like that I dread weekdays." For the past several weeks, I feel like it has taken a miracle just to make it through each day, which have been so emotionally, physically, and mentally straining. Recognizing this pattern, I was NOT looking forward to jumping right back into the grind this time around. I'll just stay in the weekend for a while, thank you very much. 

I read Psalm 25 and the commentary in my NIV Study Bible that described that chapter as "lifting up the soul in reliance on God."

[This is when the "I get it" moment hit...]

How ironic that I'm going through an extremely difficult time of weariness as I learn more about depending on God versus other people. (This theme is even evident in my recent blog posts.) There is definitely a correlation here... I am struggling because I need to learn to seek FIRST the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things will be added unto [me]. God is so intimately involved in our lives! He knows that I need to struggle in order to know Him more.

"Therefore, we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasating away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary trouble is achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
2 Corinthians 4:16

The word "therefore" at the beginning of those verses refers to the couple of verses before it that talk about faith in the One who raised Christ from the dead and God's grace that "is reaching more and more people [and] may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God." (according to the commentary) I love that! Therefore we do not lose heart! We do not give up! We are "Being renewed because of the flame of resurrection life burning within ... To fix our eyes on [our light and momentary troubles, which are temporary] would cause us to 'lose heart.'" (more notes from the commentary)

I don't want to lose heart. No matter the struggle. THEREFORE, I will fix my eyes on Jesus.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Another Day to be THANKFUL.

I haven't written about gratitude in a while, and I'm discovering more and more that this is one topic that I'm extremely passionate about. I've probably shared this before, but I'll just refresh your memory: my first year out of high school I moved 2000 miles away from home and was a part of a Christian leadership internship program. I was still struggling with the remnants of depression and crazy-false mindsets regarding who I am and who God is. My lovely core advisor, Kristi, helped me to shift my focus by encouraging me to make lists of EVERYTHING I was grateful for. Everything from having a pillow to sleep on, air to breathe, food to eat, awesome roommates, etc. Anything that came to mind. She told me that if I fill my mind with things that I'm grateful for, there won't be room for any of the other junk. I completely believe this! (If you don't, you should try it someday. Just be thankful and you WILL see a shift in the way you think.) This is how we should live our lives every day.

Today I'm grateful for the beautiful fall weather... a cozy coffee shop to spend the afternoon in... the amazing community that God has blessed me with here... an extremely relaxing afternoon yesterday - exactly what I needed... encouragement from good friends... this tasty mug of coffee :) ... an 'A' on the quiz I just took... God's provision in a fantastic job and place to live... reading just the right book at just the right time - I love receiving wisdom from Elisabeth Elliot in her book "Passion and Purity"... weddings! I'm thankful for weddings :) ... weekends - so, so grateful for the weekend to take a breather... peace that passes all understanding - thank you, Jesus!

I can choose to dwell on either the amount of school work I have, what I need to do to get caught up in Extreme Life, preparing for the Saturday morning ladies' Bible study, this head cold that is just obnoxious, the stress of budgeting and making large purchases, the many things that keep going wrong with my poor little car, etc, etc, etc.... OR I can choose to dwell on God's goodness, the many blessings that He continues to give me, His unconditional love, how He provides ALL the way EVERY time, and the truly amazing community of friends that He's put me in.

I have MUCH to be thankful for!
------------------------------------------------------

"A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones." Proverbs 17:22

"A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones." Proverbs 14:30

"An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up." Proverbs 12:25

Friday, September 16, 2011

Friday Night.

I love weddings!!!!

Tonight I got to see two of my friends, Travis & Christina, get married (at one of my favorite coffee shops - so cool!). Fortunately, I had most of the day off work AND school, so I got to enjoy coffee and great conversation with Sandy this morning, then I ordered my bridesmaid dress for Nicole's wedding ("Wedding" must be the theme of the day!), then I came home and started getting ready. I put my hair in curlers and watched Pride and Prejudice... and took a much needed nap. :) I just love getting dressed up!



Tresbien -- this made me think of you! I got so many sweet compliments on my hair/dress tonight! So fun!


All in all, a good day. I remember thinking yesterday that I'm tired of having so many NOT good days in a row. I'm grateful for a little rest and a fun wedding to get my mind off of school for a while. Sometimes you just need to take a breather.

I decided that tomorrow's going to be a good day, too. :)

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Ah, The Testing of Your Faith...

...develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:3-4

"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stance. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character; hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us." Romans 5:1-5

Wow. I love that I just opened up my blog and these two verses came right to mind. :)

I know that my sentiments on rejoicing yesterday are still true today, but they definitely seem harder to follow. I woke up exhausted with a sore throat. Bleh. I got a parking ticket last night. Lame. My British Lit exam tomorrow is TWENTY PERCENT of my grade, the study guide is ridiculously long and complicated, and I'm skipping my first morning class to study. Oh my, Lord. I did the wrong reading assignment this weekend for my comm class tonight, so I need to get caught up today. Meh.

Yet, in all this, I am confident that "in ALL things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." (Romans 8:28)

And that's all I've got for ya today. Here's to a productive, perseverance-filled day! :)

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Rejoice!

"This is the day the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it!" Psalm 118:24

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" Philippians 4:4

--------------------------------------------------------------------

What a lovely morning this has been!

I am starting to truly cherish my early morning quiet times with the Lord. In order to make this happen, I've been waking up an hour earlier than I did last year. 4:30am comes awfully early, but I'm tired by 9:30 or 10:00 at night anyways, so it works out just fine. :) [Tresbien, I took your wise words to heart in your comment on my last post....] Starting the morning being REAL with God. It's not about just reading words or going through a ritual. It's about QUALITY time... being refreshed and renewed by the Holy Spirit. This morning I wrote this prayer in my journal:

"Jesus you are all I want and all I need. Make me so aware of Your love today - through nature, provision, unexplainable peace & joy, community with other believers - whatever it is, Lord, I need my affirmation and affection to come from YOU. I need to recognize You as my Source. Seeking that out in other people around me has proved futile."

I realized, as I found an awesome parking spot today at school (which is rare, let me tell you!), how God has been answering this prayer ever since I prayed it! The kids were great this morning, my attitude was great, I feel so rested and ready for this day, I'm prepared for all my classes and don't feel stressed out or worried, I treated myself to a coffee at Dutch Bros. on my way to school, I got that great parking spot... It's only 10:00 in the morning and I am overwhelmed by the love of God in all of these little things. My demeanor and my perspective toward this day are different when I acknowledge where my help comes from... it's sure not from my own strength! Jesus, thank you for romancing my heart!

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Some Thoughts [People-Pleasing]

I haven't blogged in a while, yet again. Partly due to the craziness that is called SCHOOL and partly because I have had a million different thoughts in my head and haven't been able to sit down and sort through them long enough to post something coherent.

How do I stop caring what people think?
How do I stop placing so much weight in the opinions/feelings of other people?
(fyi - those don't have to be rhetorical questions. I'd love some feedback.)

I thought of those questions just a few minutes ago as I drove home from hanging out with a big group of friends at uswirl (frozen yogurt) after church. I have, unfortunately, recognized lately how much weight I put in what other people think of me. I highly value the opinion of other people. I just want to be acknowledged and affirmed, which to an extent is a part of how God made me to receive love. The problem is that I'm looking for that mostly in the people around me and NOT in the Lord. I can tell myself the truth, but then time after time I find myself vying for the approval of someone else.

Now I'm at the point where I've had enough. I KNOW truth, so I will not allow myself to live in lies. I will not allow the enemy to steal my joy and my confidence!

If someone else were to come to me with this same issue, what would I tell him/her? The Word - immerse yourself in scripture and be filled up with truth. Take your thoughts captive - don't dwell on what you know is not true. (Phil 4:8 "Whatever is true [...] think about such things.") Get some accountability - ask someone to help you and speak truth to you when you're struggling. These are all good things, but is there something I'm missing?!

Well, this is clearly one of the posts that I'm writing in the midst of the struggle rather than with the insight gained from working through the struggle. :) It probably doesn't help that I am a highly analytical person and very self-aware... so if something is a little "off," I try to pick it apart to get at the root of the issue. Mostly, this issue is a matter of where I place my trust - in the people around me or in God. I'm just trying to figure out what it looks like for me to be fully surrendered to the Lord and not base my value/life/emotions, off of what I think other people think.


Romans 12:2
"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will." 

Romans 8:5-6
"Those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. [...] the mind controlled by Spirit is LIFE and PEACE."

Isaiah 26:3-4
"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trust in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord, is the Rock eternal."

Monday, September 5, 2011

The Joy of Weekends -

Gosh, I am SO thankful for this weekend! As stated in my previous two posts, last week was pretty rough, but this weekend was full of just the kind of refreshment I needed. I hope every weekend this semester is as fun, relaxing and productive. Granted, I had an extra 24 hrs due to Labor Day, but that was probably necessary, considering the circumstances. Not every week will be as strenuous as the last one. (Please, Lord!)

I am reminded that "though the sorrow may last for the night, His joy comes with the morning" (Psalm 30:5). Also - "We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. [...] For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far out weighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal" (2 Corinthians 4:8-9, 17-18).

This weekend, apparently, reminds me of HOPE.

Bad days don't last forever. When I'm sad, joy is coming. When I'm confused and frazzled, peace is mine. When people don't treat me the way they should, I am STILL not alone. I am so incredibly grateful that I can live my life this way. The outcome of tomorrow is not contingent on today. His mercies are new EVERY morning, and as a child of God, I am so blessed to be able to relish in His goodness.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Learning to be INTENTIONAL

I am definitely the kind of person who needs to set aside time for "rest" and "fun." Especially in seasons like the one I'm currently in where practically every minute of every day is full of work/school/studying. It doesn't leave much room to take care of myself, which is something that usually lacks when I get busy, as silly as that sounds. I've learned how vital it is to be intentional with my time to (1) make sure everything gets accomplished that needs to and (2) make sure I don't go crazy. It's okay to put off homework for a day (i.e., Thursday nights because I don't have class on Friday) so I can enjoy a night to just read or hike or watch a movie. I don't have to be at either of the first two services at church, and the past two weeks I have been so blessed by getting a little extra rest and enjoying some peaceful and refreshing time with Jesus. Yesterday morning I met with some ladies from life group at a coffeeshop downtown, as I do every Saturday, then I made some progress on reading for my Lit class, then I had a "Girls' Night" with Lindsay and Liz - I have so much FUN with them!!!

All of that to say this: Yes, I'm awfully busy, but I will not allow that to change my priorities. I will wake up extra early to spend time with the Lord before I start my day (I know that that's what got me through last week!). I will set aside time to do FUN things with friends to ENJOY life. I will make exercising a priority to keep myself physically fit. I will take the few extra minutes to cook a healthy dinner rather than just eating out or heating something up in the microwave all the time.

I really work well when I have something to look forward to... so it definitely helps with homework productivity when I know that I'm going to meet up with a group of friends afterwards! Fun is so much sweeter when I feel like I've earned it. :-)
Lindsay, Liz + Me @ our GIRLS' Night!

Proverbs 4 tells us to guard our hearts because they are the wellspring [a source or supply of anything, especially when considered inexhaustible - dictionary.com] of life. Guarding our time has got to be close in importance to guarding our hearts. If we don't guard our time and make intentional decisions about how and where we will spend it, then we lose focus, drive, and effectiveness.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

My "I-don't-know-what-to-write-it's-been-a-long-week" Post........

Well... it's been a long time since I last blogged! A whole week and a half. That's just not acceptable, I know. But sometimes you gotta to do what you gotta do... and the last week and a half has been FULL of school, nannying, going to bed on time (for the most part), a lot a lot a LOT of reading for classes, walking a thousand miles from my car to the other side of campus for class, processing emotions, confusing relationships, figuring out health insurance, and a girl's night w/ Liz and others. Whew. You'd be tired, too.

This week has been... slightly overwhelming. Well, I won't lie, it was pretty rough and I was probably more than "slightly" overwhelmed. I'm hoping that the stress levels of this week are only indicative of my transition period back to being a student and waking up at 5:00am. It should get better over the next couple weeks as I know more of what my expectations are in each class and the amount of work I need to get done on the weekends to not be a crazy-frazzled-mess during the week... and what time I MUST go to sleep each night and maybe I'll even cook lunches/dinners the night before so I actually EAT a good meal before late afternoon.

Please pray for a restful and productive weekend so I can jump into next week ready to tackle whatever comes my way!